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Sunday, July 08, 2012

Word of Advice on Tarbiyyah by Shaykh Muhammad al-‘Uthaymeen

Shaykh Muhammad bin Saaleh al-‘Uthaymeen [May Allaah have Mercy on him] said:

A father may say to his son, ‘If you pray, I will give you a gift.’ Is this correct?
The answer is that it is not correct, because we should not teach our children that rewards are connected to the Dunya when it comes to acts of worship. Worldly lessons should not be taught when it comes to acts of worship. But the matter is easy and there is a broad scope, so there are other ways of teaching them. For example he may say, ‘go and buy some eggs and I will give you one.’ What is important to note is that fathers should not teach their children that there are worldly benefits from doing acts of the religion, this reduces the level of sincerity the child will have in future.

If you are trying to teach your child to do something that is not obligatory and increase in him the zeal to do optional good deeds, then the matter is easier because doing this good deed is not expected from him and its, perhaps, better than him not doing it. But, one should pay attention to it and maybe it would be better for you to give him Tarbiyyah in a better way so he says to his child, ‘Pray Quraan and you will get a great reward and goodness will come from it so that you will benefit’ and the likes.
Likewise, some parents tell their children that they will get a specific reward or prize for doing something good but the children don’t receive it, this is also a problem as it teaches them to lie….

[Taken from Sharh Durrah Yateemeeah, tape 4b, 18-20 mins]

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